TURN-OFF BEHAVIOURS: SOFT PARIS’ TOP 7

There are some bad habits that - without us knowing it - can become the number one enemy for our relationships. Soft Paris wrote a list of the top 7 turn-off behaviours you should really avoid.

TURN-OFF BEHAVIOURS, WHAT ABOUT THEM?

The literal meaning of the expression “turn-off” refers to all those physical, behavioural or sexual traits which instantaneously kill any kind of naughty thought. They - as suggested by the word - turn sexual desire off and can jeopardise the physical and emotional connection shared by two people.

THE TOP 7 THINGS TO AVOID:

1. Routinary behaviour:

Lack of initiative can be very harmful for the bedroom activity. Sticking to innocent cuddling is acceptable only when you’re not at the top of your game, but if you indulge in it too frequently it can be very dangerous! Always the same touches, positions, habits… goodbye libido, welcome monotony! Never stop experimenting is the key for a satisfying and - most of all - entertaining sex life!!

2. Too much affection kills desire:

Are you in a constant pursuit of affection? Try and avoid asking too much to your partner, otherwise you’ll face the risk of being let down. Let him/her breathe and be sure that he/she feels comfortable all the time. We assure you that he/she’ll be the first one to come to you. So here’s your new mantra: good things come to those who wait, so… be patient!

3. Forgetting to have fun:

The shortage of humor can lead to a drop in the libido. Is it worthy to keep going when you no longer laugh together? Surely it’s one of the most used (and abused) cliches, but the expression “if you want to win a woman you need to make her laugh” has actually been scientifically proven. Jeffrey Hall, communication studies professor, carried out a research later published on the Evolutionary Psychology magazine: when two strangers meet for the first time, the more the men tries to be funny - and the more that amuses the woman - the more likely the courtship will be successful.

4. Being TOO chatty between the sheets:

When your partner keeps talking about his/her day, even between the sheets, there’s only one possible outcome: a sexual desire drop. Same goes for excessive sentimentalities, never-ending questions and talking about any topic which could inhibit arousal. Well, during those moments it’s better to be more cryptic and mysterious!

5. Trash talking: what is it?

Trash talking literally means “the use of disparaging or boastful language”. Talking like a docker, over-using questionable metaphor, or even being offensive is never sexy. This kind of behaviour can really ruin the atmosphere of such a delicate moment. So goodbye vulgar vocabulary and welcome naughty but sweet words, just flirt in a chic way!

6. Excessive comfort is never gonna be sexy...

As time goes by, you and your partner are going to feel more and more comfortable around each other. A little too fast, if you don’t mind us saying that! During cold winter nights slipping into an old tracksuit or a thick pyjama can surely be tempting. Yet there’s nothing better than those shapeless fabrics to make sexual desire run away for good. The french psychiatrist, psychotherapist and sexologist Jean-Roger Dintrans says that “pyjamas reminds us of our childhood and comfort” but “it also makes desire disappear and it communicates «I am not available»”. So better forget the old pyjamas and choose something sexier!

7. “Too much of anything is in every case a defect” - Seneca

Asking too much from your partner can be dangerously stressful. So take your time, focus on the good things and try to get to know each other as deeply as you can. Don’t go off on a tangent, wait for the right time to introduce him/her to your parents, visit apartments, adopt a pet and - most importantly - talk about marriage. In short, avoid putting the cart before the horse!

HOW TO STAY AWAY FROM TURN-OFF BEHAVIOURS

Moderation is the key to preserve the magic. Fighting these kinds of behaviours has to be an everyday job, but we guarantee it’s worthy. Put bad habits aside and focus on tenderness, sensuality and eroticism. Our Advisors will guide you on the right path, meet them during a Soft Party and make your relationship magic again.