Masturbation : a singles-only practice?

Since its introduction to the English language in the 18th Century, “masturbation” has carried negative connotations. With its etymological origins in the words “manu” (hand) and “stuprare” (defile), masturbation literally means "to defile with the hand". Extra-marital self-loving is an often neglected topic. It’s commonly understood that 99% of men self-loving regularly, while the remaining 1% that say they don’t are likely to be lying. Though self-loving is almost accepted as a resort of the single, it may raise a few questions for those maintaining relationships.

When it comes to your partnered sex drives, it’s unrealistic to expect each other to match up consistently. You won’t always be ‘in the mood’ at the exact same time and when it comes down to having good sex, it’s more down to your mental state than your physical one. So if your partner is feeling hot and heavy, you may not always be reciprocating.. With this in mind, self-loving whilst in a relationship is understandable. In fact, allowing yourself to explore your sensuality and discover what your body responds well to and doesn’t can be a great learning curve and may allow you to express your needs more effectively. So, if you self-love frequently yet still enjoy a sex life that ensures you are both happy, then by all means continue at that pace. However, if your self-loving is getting in the way of your sex life and you find that you self-love more than having sex with your partner, then this may be a cause for concern. Self-loving shouldn’t take over your sex life, just compliment it. Find a balance that makes both you and your partner happy. The use of tantra sex teaches you how to have slow, non-orgasmic sensual intercourse, focussing on enlightening each other and not racing to the ‘finish’ line. Communication is key to any relationship and discussing this with your partner will allow you to come to an agreement that will make you both feel comfortable. Discover new ways to take your relationship further by booking a Soft Paris ‘Les Amants’ party plan event. You’ll get tailored advice from a Soft Paris Advisor and discover our range of exclusive products for couples...